I should preface, we haven't had a working dishwasher since 2023. So, in my house, we may have more after dinner chores than at your house. But I am curious, have you found a system that works for your household for kitchen cleanup in the evening? Do you have formal jobs for each household member? Does one of you do all or most of the cleanup? If you all pitch in, do you rotate chores?
Up until about a month ago, after dinner cleanup was a bit haphazard in our house. Someone always washed dishes. The other three would do everything else -- dry, clean counters, sweep the floor in the toe kick area of the cabinets, put leftovers away, etc. But we had no real system for these auxiliary chores.
Then a month ago, after some frustrations between us and minor resentment that maybe some were doing less than others, I decided we would formally divvy up the tasks. We now have one person who washes dishes and wipes out the microwave (usually me), another who puts everything away from the dish rack from the day's washing and sweeps in the toe kick area in the cooking zone, a third who dries and puts away clean dishes/cookware from dinner, and the last one transfers dishes/cookware from the counters and stove to the sink, puts away leftovers, and wipes the counters and stove down. Four distinct jobs that take approximately equal amounts of time to perform.
A couple of the jobs can be completed (or mostly so) before we sit down to dinner. So someone or someones can request to do those jobs if they have something going on in the evening and would like to be done earlier. An example, I wash dishes all day long and leave them to air dry in the dish drainer and the top shelf of the nonworking dishwasher. One daughter has evening meetings a couple of days per week. On those nights, she'll be the person who puts away everything that has air dried during the day, doing so before we sit down to eat. My husband also likes to finish up early in the evenings and will take that job on other nights. I don't mind washing, and honestly, I do the most thorough job while saving the most water, plus I'm very quick. It just makes sense for me to have that job most nights.
On nights when one or both daughters are out for dinner, I usually plan something super easy and that also has very little cleanup. Cleaning up after two people can be a lot easier than doing so for four.
This reminds me of a conversation I had with some of the young girls I worked with before retiring. They thought it was terrible that I cooked every night. For a man!! I explained that I enjoy cooking, grew up with home cooked meals, and that while I cooked my husband was feeding animals in the house (cat, dog) as well as doing the feeding at the barn (my chickens, horses, etc.). He carries our plates to the table, gets drinks and silverware set up, while I quickly wash up saucepans, pots, utensils. After dinner he clears the plates and loads the dishwasher while I’m wiping down stove, countertops. It’s a lot of little things that we each do as a team. Put on a new roll of paper towels, refill the soap dispenser. He carries out the trash, I put in the new liner. Sadly, I don’t think they grasped the concept of teamwork and I know that they don’t realize all the things that have to be done getting a meal ready and how helpful it is having someone who willingly does the routine with you. Good for you and your family pulling together and each knowing what to do to keep those good healthy meals coming. Annie
ReplyDeleteHi Annie,
DeleteIt really is all about teamwork, isn't it? I feel badly for the young women who thought cooking every night was an undesirable chore and sexist. Many successful couples divide up the work according to each partner's strengths.
Thank you for sharing.
Sounds like you have a hit upon an efficient way to clean the kitchen that is agreeable to everyone. With only two of us here, we are more casual about the cleanup. My husband finds washing dishes by hand meditative, so he likes to do that. I like clean and organized counters, so I do that more often. But we don't sweat it. We do whatever, including leaving the dishes for another day. My sons, who live together, have divided things differently. One of them cooks and the other cleans up. That division speaks to each of their strengths.
ReplyDeleteHi Live and Learn,
DeleteThat's nice to hear that your sons can be so agreeable about the cooking and clean-up. They sound wise.
Hmm, I wonder how my husband and I will handle clean-up when we're empty nesters? Thanks for sharing, Live and Learn.
I'm going to be the odd person out here. I grew up with a family of 5 kids two adults and no dishwasher. My own family with three kids and two adults and a dishwasher that had it's fair share of issues in our previous home led me to handwash as much as possible. Different house now and mostly just the two of us so we wash dishes, dry them and put them away together after cooking a home cooked meal every single day (all meals are made in my kitchen). We have a working dishwasher that we rarely used until one day it decided to leak. At the same time, daughter had a baby and the family was coming to visit from out of town and really wanted a dishwasher to sanitize baby bottles so we got a new one. I rarely use it but a couple time a month to keep is running well. We just don't argue or have heated discussions about cleanup. We do like a spotless kitchen after our meal and as we get ready to end the day. It is a good way to wind down into a stressless evening as we need good sleep. Lunches are made the night before and my coffee is ready to hit the start button in the morning. This just makes our routine calming. Yeah, you might say that there is only two of us but we do have guests once in a while and I clean up after that too! And remember all our meals are cooked from scratch which can make a mound of dishes that need to be cleaned up. Oh and I work full time mostly out of the home. And I bake all our bread products. It's really where you want to pick battles or where you want to find calmness. I choose calmness and on that note hubby just drove in the driveway home from work, so i better get supper served!
ReplyDeleteAlice
P.S. Yes, I cook for a man but he's my husband whom I love and will do anything for him! I don't think kids today get that.
Hi Alice,
DeleteI really prefer a clean kitchen at the end of the evening. Knowing I'll come down to a clean kitchen in the morning is a pleasure worth the work to do the cleaning.
Cooking everything from scratch really adds to the dishes needing washed. As I cook dinner, I keep a dishpan filled with soapy water and try to wash as I go. But there are still many items needing washing after we eat.
I like your attitude of choosing calmness. Thank you for sharing.
As always, Lili, you are much more organized than I am. I confess that I am a little bit OCD about how the dishwasher is loaded (my family would say that I'm VERY OCD about it) so I prefer to load it myself, although sometimes other family members do that. It may sound odd to you, but whoever cooks does most of the cleaning. Since my husband cooks on the weekends, it means that (other than loading the dishwasher--see above) I get the weekend off from kitchen duties, which is a nice break for me. My son is temporarily living at home. He's quite handy in the kitchen, but I haven't required him to help out there. I put him to work with cleaning/shoveling snow/yardwork, etc., so he's contributing to the running of the household. It seems to work for us. I don't think there's a right or wrong answer--it's a matter of coming up with a system that works for your family. I should mention that my husband can usually tell when I'm feeling overwhelmed, and he will pick up kitchen duties at the drop of a hat if need be.
ReplyDeleteHi Kris,
DeleteIt does sound like your household has a method/system that works for all of you. And it's good that you realize your tendencies with dishwasher loading. I'm the same way about hand-washing dishes. I like them done a certain way, so that's the job I volunteer for every night. Fortunately, the rest of my family is not at all keen on the washing part.
Your husband is a keeper, but you already know that!
I’ve always had this thing about doing dishes after dinner-I hate it lol. Once I’m finished cooking I’m officially off duty til the next day. I’ve always had a dishwasher. When we ought our first house it didn’t have one. I gave my Dh two choices-by a portable dishwasher or we will use paper plates and plastic silver-if I bother to cook lol. When the kids were here the boys cleared the table, wiped it off, and wiped the counter. The girls unloaded and then reloaded the dishwasher and wiped off the stove. When they left so did any help in the kitchen. Dh does usually put the food away.
ReplyDeleteDiane
Hi Diane,
DeleteI can understand feeling "done" once the meal is cooked and you've eaten. Cooking is a lot of work, and the clean-up part is probably the least desirable part of that work. I'm glad you've always had a dishwasher, Diane.