My kids and frugality --
I sometimes wonder if my kids are getting the stewardship-of-resources-and-time bit. As they stand in the shower for ages, gawk for many minutes at the contents of the opened refrigerator, or, hold the back door to the house open, in the midst of winter, while talking with someone outside -- I just wonder, "are they getting it"?
Then one of them says something that makes me think, "finally, they understand how I feel about thoughtful use of our resources".
The other night, while talking about the weekend ahead, and shared use of the car, I mentioned to my son that the girls had tea this weekend. That means, they go up to our church and wash dishes for the elderly women who put on fund-raising teas once a month. (It's not all altruistic, however. They get fed a nice assortment of sandwiches, desserts and cocoa!)
Anyways, I mentioned this to my son, as I would be needing the one good car to take them the 35 minute round trip there, then again 35 minutes round trip to get them home later in the day. To this, my son replied, "perfect, I'm needing a haircut."
What does his haircut have to do with the girls' tea time work? The barber (yea! he no longer needs me to cut his hair -- that's a stress I'm glad to let go of) is just down the hill from our church.
His driving to the barber would entail a third 35 minute round trip drive, if he went separately. By his going this Saturday, he'll drop the girls off, get his haircut, then come home, saving one of the 35 minute trips that direction and back. Yea! He gets it! By arranging errands, we save gas.
I suppose our kids can't help but absorb our views, to some extent. We are constantly reminding them to turn off the water, shut the refrigerator, close the door, etc. Some kids do respond with "when I grow up, I'm going to be rich so I can do x-money-squandering-activity". But for the most part our kids do grow up internalizing our values. They may have a period of overspending when first adults. And they may express our values differently, choosing to economize in areas that had little importance to us, while spending where we had always been frugal. Or, they may be more or less extreme than we are. But there really is truth in the saying "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree".
I look at my own family. My parents were careful with their money in many areas, but had some areas where they spent less cautiously. Yet they were always responsible. My siblings and I grew up to be good stewards of our resources, as well. We each have different income levels, which allow more or less spending on non-necessities, on our parts. But none of us are dead-beats. We all work hard, make thoughtful choices, and live within our means.
To this day, I can hear my mom and dad's voices, saying "turn off the lights when you leave the room", "don't let the water run while you're brushing your teeth", and "you've got legs, you can walk there". As a kid I thought, "they're such fuddy-duddies". But now as an adult, I see the wisdom in their ways and sayings, every time I open the utility bill, or fill the car with gas -- I see their wisdom. And now, I get to see that my kids are getting that wisdom, too. They get it. Gas costs money, and money takes work to earn.
Yes, I think my kids are finally "getting it". If your kids have "gotten it", then celebrate -- you've done an awesome job! If it sometimes feels that your kids are not "getting it", give it time, explain the money equals work concept over and over, until you're blue in the face. Let them in on your family's money management process. Give them a way to earn money themselves for their "wants". It takes time.
I didn't always feel that my own kids were "getting it". My son has "gotten it", and I'm seeing signs that my daughters are in the process, as well. But not quite time for the hallelujahs, yet!
